Monday, July 26, 2010

Working Lettie Hard

Today started early for Lettie. We had speech at 8am and worked on some cognitive stuff. We then had OT and PT. During PT we discovered that her left tibia( a bone in her lower leg) is longer than the right by a few centimeters. They are going to make her a new brace anyway to help support her knee more during standing. We had more speech, PT, OT and music therapy this afternoon. I'm a little concerned because when she napped this afternoon every time she woke up she had that "look" in her eyes like she was going to have a seizure. I've prayed so much today that God will not allow the seizures to return. Unfortunately, she vomited tonight after they gave her meds and started her night feed with her NG tube. This poor child can't seem to get a break. I have emailed our dietician at Vandy cause we have now vomited twice here since Sat. and we never had these issues before so I'm thinking something is off with the amount of formula she's getting. She was a little more alert today, but as we worked in therapy I see how far we have to go to just get back to our pre-surgery baseline. This surgery has been very difficult for us! I would've never done this to her if I could've imagined a few of these things happening, much less, all the complications she's been through. The neuro team came in today and said they saw some abnormal spiking on the left side temporal lobe. This isn't good, it's actually pretty bad. This means we could now start having seizures that come from the left side. If this happens, the surgery was a total waste and we've done nothing more than take the child we had and made her life even more difficult than it was. Please pray the seizures will not return and she will make some huge gains in therapy. This is a slow process, I know, I'm living it out with her but I really need our God to give this child some peace and hope for her future to get better. Looking for better days soon.

25 comments:

  1. We are praying right now for peace and hope for little Lettie and the seizures not return. We are also praying for you too, Summer.

    Lori S.

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  2. Preston CunninghamJuly 26, 2010 at 10:42 PM

    Our team of prayer warriors is still working hard for Lettie!

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  3. Summer, please know that none of us are going to stop praying for Lettie's healing or for you. I'm so sorry this has been another difficult day. We love you all. LeaAnne

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  4. I am so sorry that things aren't going better for you in Atlanta. I think about Lettie and pray for her and your family all the time. I know a boy who had the same surgery for seizures around thirteen years ago. He was older than Lettie, but had many of the same problems after surgery. Jonathan is on the same sort of diet Lettie is on and it seems to help. Unfortunately, in his case, he still has seizures, but his mother said that she felt that it was better to have tried to do something about them than to do nothing. He graduated high school two or three years ago and is doing fine. I know in my heart that you would do anything for your precious child. Don't second guess yourself or you will drive yourself mad with all the what ifs. Continue to do what you think is best for Lettie Bug. The Lord will guide and protect you and your family. There are tons and tons of people who love and support you all. You may not know very many of us, but we are here and we are praying. My family sends you love and prayers in this trying time. I hope Lettie start making marked improvement. We will all be praying for her. Lynn Greer

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  5. We are continuing to lift little Lettie to the Lord. I pray also that God will give you peace, that you've done the right thing for Lettie, that peace like a river will attend your soul (can you hear that song?) and you will soon be able to say, "It is well with my soul". Is there anything you need?

    Penny

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  6. I am sorry that this journey has been so difficult and continues to be for your family, for Lettie, for you. I don't know you at all but I think about little Lettie all the time now. I pray for all of you constantly. I know you are doubting your decision to have this surgery, but I can tell that it wasn't one you entered into without much discussion, research, prayers and signs. Hindsight is always 20/20. You are a faithful, dedicated and amazingly strong Mother. Take each day as it comes and tackle one obstacle at a time. One day, life will be a new version of normal and this will be a distant memory. I hope you and Lettie have a restful night.

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  7. Summer you have been amazing thru this and awesome the last 17 mos walking this bumpy curvy road with Lettie.
    She has to be tired with such a rigorous schedule they have.
    You know they are zooming in on her to note the difference in the tibias and that is what you want. You are tapping into a new and specialized team of knowledge there and just be a sponge and soak it all up.... believe me they knew when they met you that you weren't a Mom just going thru the motions and they will want to do their best where Lettie's concerned.
    We know you are weary... you, Mark and Lettie have been thru sooooo much but you can do this and do it well even if you cry, get exasperated or pray every hour.

    We think of you alll thru the day and love you.

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  8. You all are in my prayers. You don't know me at all but through a friend of a friend I saw a facebook post with your blogsite posted on it. I have a relative who has been an employee at Children's Hospital in Atlanta for the past 18 years - in the neuro department. I can assure you that they are truly in it for the children and will do everything and anything in their power to help your sweet little girl.

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  9. Dina and Danny LongJuly 27, 2010 at 12:02 AM

    Summer, Just caught up w/everything from the past week. You are DEFINITELY a strong lady, dont let your guard down. Collette will make it through, she's got your and Marks good traits-determination, toughness, and a fighter! I cried reading your updates, I was thinking if that was Penelope, I would have a hard time keeping it together. Danny & I are praying so much for the clouds above her to have a silver lining, the sun to shine brighter each day and for all of you peace of mind soon. God will answer, he knows you have the faith, so does Lettie. May tonight bring you girls rest and tomorrow be better. XOXOXOXO's

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  10. Summer,
    We all are still praying for Lettie and your entire family. A mom will do anything in her power to take pain and hurt away from her child. We all know why you decided for your precious daughter to have this surgery, b/c you wanted better for Lettie. That's what any of us would want for our child. You don't need to question if you did the right thing, just know you did, and you did it for the right reason. The Lord is hearing all these prayers being prayed for Lettie, He won't let her down. You have had so much faith and have been strong for so long, just stay strong, I'm praying right now for you to have strength to carry on. Lettie needs her mom and dad to be strong right now, and stand up and question why things are being done the way they are. I'm glad that you emailed your Vandy dietician re: the amount of formula they're giving her. You may be right...maybe it's too much since she keeps getting sick while she's being fed. I am praying that she will continue to be seizure free, and the bloodflow to the thalamus will be restored, her left side will have full movement and feeling again, and just that this sweet baby will have some peace and lots of hope for her future. I don't know Lettie or your family, but I feel like I do. I hate that your baby is having to go through this hard time. We all love Lettie and just want so badly for her to be completely healed and for your family to be able to all be home together again. I pray for you guys everyday, several times a day. I'll continue to pray for as long as Lettie needs these prayers. Try to get some rest tonight. Know that there are thousands praying for all of you. God is good!
    Valerie Allen

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  11. Summer, you and Mark did not make a mistake. You have been praying for God's will be done for Lettie. When you are praying and trusting Jesus with a decision, He won't allow you to make a mistake! I am praying all day for Lettie to receive a miracle from God. I am sure it's so hard to watch Lettie suffer. I'm sorry you have to go through this. I have faith that Lettie will be healed. Just tell our savior "Jesus I trust in you". Karen Carlson

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  12. I know that you know this already....but you did what you felt was the right thing to do for Lettie. The meds were not keeping her from having seizures, and she just simply couldn't have kept having them like she was. You and Mark did exactly what any parent would do....you desperately wanted those seizures to stop. We will never stop praying for her. We will never stop praying for you and Mark either. Through all of this there will be a blessing. It may be tough to see, but it is there. Lettie has already touched so many peoples' lives!!! We pray that tomorrow will be a better day and that the days keep getting better from here on. We pray that you will be back home in Knoxville soon with that sweet, smiling Lettie Bug!!!

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  13. Keep up the faith. I am continueing to pray for Lettie. I pray right now that God will give you the miracle and most of all I pray for strength for you and your family. My daughter Ava has seizures on both sides of the brain. I remember feeling all these emotions and still do sometimes. Let me know if you guys need anything while you are in Atlanta. I am local.

    Shawn Oglesby
    oglesby_s@bellsouth.net
    carepage: miracleprincess

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  14. Summer, I wish I could take away your pain and heartaches. Please know you are such a wonderful Mom to Lettie! As Moms - this is what we do - we love our children and protect them to the 'inth degree' - the same way our Heavenly Father does for each of us. We are continuing to lift all of you in prayer. Many times I wake during the night and I pray. First thing in the morning I pray. Lots and lots of prayer warriors are praying on your behalf. You and your sweet family are loved Summer. Don't ever, ever forget it. You have touched so many lives - including mine. May God Bless you in a real special way. Praying hard in East TN...

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  15. How frustrating it must be to have to see your baby this way. Have patience, it will be a long process. Just find comfort in remembering that before she was ever your baby she was God's. Her Father is taking care of her and although you may not get a miracle in your timing it will be in His. Unfortunately our flesh lets us give God more glory in a situation based on how bad it gets. If she came out of surgery perfect any unbeliever could have said that she simply had a brilliant Dr. Although she may have had an amazing team of specialists God is going to show everyone that it is by His hand and by His time that He heals His angel.

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  16. praying....patti brown, knoxville

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  17. God, Please help this child!! Amen

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  18. Summer,
    You don't know me, but I heard about you and your family through a coworker and have been following your blog for the past few weeks. One of my friends has a beautiful little boy that had to have heart surgery last year and she went through many similar struggles. She also keeps a blog and during that time someone posted a quote that was a huge comfort to her and has become one of my favorites.
    "There is nothing...no circumstance, no trouble, no testing...that can ever touch me until, first of all, it has gone past God and past Christ, right through to me. If it has come that far, it has come with a great purpose, which I may not understand at the moment! But as I refuse to become panicky, and as I lift up my eyes to Him and accept it as coming from the throne of God for some great purpose of blessing to my own heart, then no sorrow will ever disturb me, no trial will ever disarm me, no circumstance will cause me to fret, for I shall rest in the joy of what my Lord it." -Alan Redpath
    God has brought you to this point,and he will bring you through it. Your little Lettie is doing great things in the world - look at all of the people she is bringing together and all of the prayers that are being sent up in her honor. I will continue to remember you all in my prayers. Lots of love to you all.
    Farrah Linkous

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  19. A book suggestion :Your Sorrow is My Sorrow and chronicles the life and struggles of Mary, Jesus' Mother. .I have learned so much from this book of the Mother who suffered and rejoiced time and again over the life of her Son Jesus.

    Paraphrased:How did she get through any of it, much less ALL of it? She was confused and grieved, she questioned and got angry, but she leaned on others to help her navigate through her pain, she reflected on her life to find meaning, and she had an incredible Faith that God would never leave her..... and then she drew strength from the very son that she grieved for.

    If you would like to send you a copy as a gift. Please post the hospital address
    Thanks,
    KLP

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  20. Jennifer Ramsey BoschJuly 27, 2010 at 10:33 AM

    I still pray everyday for previous Lettie. Don't have any regrets! God will take care of her and you. I pray God gives you peace and strength although you are the strongest mother I've ever known! I hope therapy goes good for Lettie today and you see progress. Know that your family is on hundreds of people's minds and in their prayers.

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  21. You have done what any mother would do; prayerfully, carefully made a decision with Lettie's best interest in mind.
    Do not let those regrets creep in and distract you. Like many others, I don't know you personally, but I KNOW you are working hard and are an amazing mother and woman.
    Praying for a blessing.
    Kelly Bolus

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  22. The Lord is near to all who call on him, to all who call on him in truth Psalms 145:18

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  23. I was just watching a video of the story behind Josh Wilson's "Before the Morning". Don't know if you'd seen it or not. The song is about a couple who have a son that has faced what seemed an impossible medical condition to live with. http://apps.facebook.com/joshwilson/ I love what the mom said about living with hope for healing. She said "If we can trust God with our eternity, we can trust Him with our now." Praying that God will give you the strength to deal with this moment by moment. There's no way anyone, not even the doctors, could have predicted exactly how Lettie would do with the surgery. And with God there is no way they can predict what will happen in the future for certain. Still praying that God will give her complete healing.

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  24. I don't know what the best words would be to say in a time like this, but that we are praying for Lettie, you and the rest of your family.
    Candice Slack

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  25. When you're up against a struggle
    That shatters all your dreams
    And your hope's been cruelly crushed
    by Satan's manifested scheme
    And you feel the urge within you
    To submit to earthly fears
    Don't let the faith your standing in
    seem to disappear...PRAISE THE LORD,
    He can work through those who praise Him
    Praise the Lord
    For our God inhabits praise
    Praise the Lord
    For the chains that seem to bind you
    Service only to remind you
    That they drop Powerless behind you
    When you Praise Him.
    Satan is a LIAR
    And he wants to make us think
    That we are pauapers
    When he knows himself
    We're children of the KING
    So lift up the mighty shield of faith
    For the battle must be won
    WE know that JESUS CHRIST is risen
    So the Works already done! PRAISE THE LORD

    TRUE LYRICS TO A SONG THAT I PRAYS MINISTERS TO YOUR HEART

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